0
it's gonna be a bright sunshine-y day
Posted by Slowplum
on
10/25/2006 09:32:00 AM
Whew. Thank God all that self-absorbed sadness decided to take a hike.
For reasons I'm not comfortable disclosing at this point, this is a really hard time of year for me, and I sometimes have to fight the sadness in favor of cheerful, but as long as I surround myself with positivity things seem to go ok. Last night positivity meant watching old episodes of The Family Guy. Also talking to a friend after picking C up from Brownies was nice - most of the people in my life are drama mamas and that's fine and all, but sometimes you need a break from it and just want to natter about whatevers and whosits as opposed to the "oh em gee I hate so and so they did xyz insignificant thing that just drove me up the bend".
Another major contributor to the yucky feelings were probably due to the fact that the gynecologist has now put me on birth control. Looks like the progesterone levels in my body were making it all crazy and stuff. As in, the ovaries refusing to let go of the eggs they were producing, acne forming, hair being courser/thicker, the migraines, the crazy menstrual cycles, the issues with my breasts, etc etc. So since the ovaries weren't letting go of the eggs, these eggs accumulated over time and caused all those follicular cysts that have been causing me grief. Since the ovaries never released eggs, the uterus didn't know it was supposed to shed anything - it just kept waiting patiently for the egg to drop. Eventually my body would overload and just shed it all at once - thank you progestrone. The doctor went through my entire medical history and basically said that I've likely had this problem all my life, and he was amazed I had two kids. Then we went on to discuss the various points in my life that I was actually on birth control. Oh boy did the fun start then.
I am today defining irony in this manner: had I not been on birth control when I was seeing SO, I probably would not have gotten pregnant at all. Both of my children are indeed birth control babies. There we were, thinking we were all responsible and shit, and basically, I was facilitating my body to do what it should have done normally anyway. The doctor said however that this was probably likely due to the type of birth control I was on, that caused my hormonal levels to be at just the right point. And since my pituitary adenoma was also likely a contributor - fighting back at the birth control, making me prime for fertilization - the chances of that being the issue now are much slimmer, as my pituitary seems to be attacking the other adrenals these days anyway.
Needless to say, I'm really really glad SO had a vasectomy. So um. Sorry for the up close and personal. But you know. Inquiring minds, et al.
K wore his Jayne hat with pride today, citing that it matched his coat perfectly, and nobody else on the playground would have one. C wants one but not in the crazy orange and yellow and redness - she wants one in blue tones. So I went to Giant Tiger and picked up some cheap yarn (no sense in getting wool when acrylic will do and is just as warm) so tonight I start making a blue Jayne hat.
Well. I think that's enough update for now, hmm?
For reasons I'm not comfortable disclosing at this point, this is a really hard time of year for me, and I sometimes have to fight the sadness in favor of cheerful, but as long as I surround myself with positivity things seem to go ok. Last night positivity meant watching old episodes of The Family Guy. Also talking to a friend after picking C up from Brownies was nice - most of the people in my life are drama mamas and that's fine and all, but sometimes you need a break from it and just want to natter about whatevers and whosits as opposed to the "oh em gee I hate so and so they did xyz insignificant thing that just drove me up the bend".
Another major contributor to the yucky feelings were probably due to the fact that the gynecologist has now put me on birth control. Looks like the progesterone levels in my body were making it all crazy and stuff. As in, the ovaries refusing to let go of the eggs they were producing, acne forming, hair being courser/thicker, the migraines, the crazy menstrual cycles, the issues with my breasts, etc etc. So since the ovaries weren't letting go of the eggs, these eggs accumulated over time and caused all those follicular cysts that have been causing me grief. Since the ovaries never released eggs, the uterus didn't know it was supposed to shed anything - it just kept waiting patiently for the egg to drop. Eventually my body would overload and just shed it all at once - thank you progestrone. The doctor went through my entire medical history and basically said that I've likely had this problem all my life, and he was amazed I had two kids. Then we went on to discuss the various points in my life that I was actually on birth control. Oh boy did the fun start then.
I am today defining irony in this manner: had I not been on birth control when I was seeing SO, I probably would not have gotten pregnant at all. Both of my children are indeed birth control babies. There we were, thinking we were all responsible and shit, and basically, I was facilitating my body to do what it should have done normally anyway. The doctor said however that this was probably likely due to the type of birth control I was on, that caused my hormonal levels to be at just the right point. And since my pituitary adenoma was also likely a contributor - fighting back at the birth control, making me prime for fertilization - the chances of that being the issue now are much slimmer, as my pituitary seems to be attacking the other adrenals these days anyway.
Needless to say, I'm really really glad SO had a vasectomy. So um. Sorry for the up close and personal. But you know. Inquiring minds, et al.
K wore his Jayne hat with pride today, citing that it matched his coat perfectly, and nobody else on the playground would have one. C wants one but not in the crazy orange and yellow and redness - she wants one in blue tones. So I went to Giant Tiger and picked up some cheap yarn (no sense in getting wool when acrylic will do and is just as warm) so tonight I start making a blue Jayne hat.
Well. I think that's enough update for now, hmm?