well well well

Quite possibly the best day I've had in a while, and also one of the most frustrating.

I took the day off work. Got the kids ready & fed them waffles. C had a tooth extracted yesterday (her adult bottom front tooth had already started growing in, BEHIND the baby tooth) so the "tooth fairy" left her some coins and some stickers. She was way way more impressed by the stickers, which just goes to show you.

We took C to school and then took K with me to go get some paperwork done.

K was holding my hand, walking beside me on the way into the hrdc building, and looked up at me with a smile I haven't seen in a while. "Today is my day, right mommy?"

"Right."

"How come we can't be together every day?"

Which lead to a discussion about jobs, and money, etc.

We went out to the looney store and got some wrapping for the gift for my cousin's confirmation thinger this weekend. K asked for a little plastic animal and of course I obliged, just for today. Then I said, "see honey, if mommy didn't work, I wouldn't have any money to get you this dinosaur."

He pondered that for a while. Then we went over to a friend's house who has a little boy K's age. The boys played while we talked. Then we all went to lunch. On the way home after lunch, K asked me why the little boy's mommy wasn't working. I said she didn't work because she stayed home to watch her boys (she has four of them). He then asked how come she could stay home and I couldn't. She had monies to get lunch. Boy oh boy. For an almost-four-year-old the kid is pretty perceptive.

He could tell he had upset me a little, so when we got home he picked a few tulips from our front garden and gave them to me, saying "mommy I don't like you sad. I love you mommy." and he gave me a huge hug.

Then we played around for a bit until it was time to go to C's school. We both went and I read to her class, "Green Eggs & Ham" to be exact. The kids had a ball and C was proud as a peacock to have her mommy there reading to her class.

Came back home, puttered around tidying things up a bit with K, then went back and got her a few hours later.

She and he both said, it was the best day ever, because their mommy was home to do the things they always want her to do.

*sigh*

I've never felt so loved and so conflicted. :(


PS we bought a car.

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The inner mom is strong in me.

I work for a few reasons:

I never want it to be said that I am a financial burden on my other half.
I don't want to turn around 10 years from now and see that my kids are grown and I have nothing to do now.
I like interacting with other adults, talking about things that aren't kid-like.
I'm a workaholic. To a fault.
I never want it to be said that I am a financial burden on my other half. (re-iterated to drive the point home)
I like my financial independence.
I like my financial independence.
I love my financial independence.