So much has happened since my last post. I guess I'll just do the perfunctory "Hey it is hot as heck out there and I am tired and that's that."

Real post to come soon.

What is new?

I'll never forget you. Ever. I love you. I love you. I love you.

Finally getting my vision back, sort of. Things are still blurry but nowhere near as blurry as before.

MRI is tomorrow at "oh my god it's too damn early" o'clock. I'm equal parts nervous and calm. I don't really know what I want from this. Answers, to be sure, but you know what they say about getting what you wish for.

My daughter has been writing a story which tickles me to pieces. She's almost 12 and parts of her writing make it glaringly obvious that she's an adolescent girl, but oh my is she clever. The story is interesting and her dialogue cracks me up. She definitely picked up my dry wit.

I've been listening to CCR; no idea why. Maybe because I miss my Dad. He once wore out this tape he had of their greatest hits, when we would go on long drives to visit family. So Dad, this is for you. Can't wait till you & mom are home.

So proud to be Canadian for this year's Winter Olympics. The most gold ever? Take that United States of 'We think we are the best at everything'!

I have been fighting off this cold for a while, which sucks but is better than the flu I had last week - naaaaasty. Blood and viscera. Not fun at all.

So they found scars on my liver and right kidney. No idea what caused them though. I yet continue to confound science. Sadly I've begun to be okay with that.

I've been feeling like a hermit these past few months - I don't really do anything or go anywhere. It isn't my fault - I rarely have the *energy* to verb all over the place.

My brother's twins celebrated their first birthday with great fun and mischievous smiles. Who doesn't love smashing cake into their mouths? I can't believe a year has gone by already - it went so very fast. I love being an aunt so much. I am doubly blessed to call myself their godmother as well. It's so fun to have babies around that you can hand back to the parents when you are tired, heheheh.

I'm getting a tattoo this weekend, if my cold doesn't get worse. I am getting it with my sisinlaw, we are getting the same one, the celtic symbol for sisters. It is her gift to me for helping her out with her upcoming nuptials.

My parents are returning to Canada in June - they have both had more than enough of Mexico and are very homesick. They said it was a wonderful opportunity but enough is enough, they even are looking forward to having Canadian winters again - bizarre. It is going to be so nice to have them home again. I can't wait.

Ok that's all for now I guess. I need to get back into the habit of writing in this thing, even if it's only for myself.

Cheers.

I love Ok Go. That is all.

It's been forever and a day since updating this thing. I had to shovel at least a foot of dust off.

I'm still in medical limbo, most recent round of tests "inconclusive" which is medical speak for "There's something there, but damned if we know what to do about it".

The weather out there is terrible. I hate winter. People say "oh, but you'd miss the snow if you didn't have it" or "but Christmas is just not the same without snow" and to that I say BULLSHIT. That's right. I'm calling the bullshit card.

My daughter got her ears pierced again, we did it the weekend my Mom was home. Which was incidentally the same weekend of the baptism for my twin nieces. They were adorable and very well-behaved. I'm their Madrin AND Padrin, by funny default. What happened is that my brother and his wife chose me and her sister to be the godparents of both, with no godfather. However, during the lighting of the candles, the Deacon asked all the godfathers to step up to take the candles. So M's sister and I looked at each other, shrugged, and I went for it, being the Catholic one of us. So I've been teased about being their godfather, which puts me into Marlin Brando autopilot. Those poor girls have a crazy aunt/godmother/godfather.

I really, really, really, really, REALLY want a Kindle. As a self-professed bibliophile, the appeal of this to me is huge - imagine carrying around hundreds of books at once! Ummm, yes please!

They have a version for the PC, so I do have it installed in my laptop, but it isn't the same. Not by a long shot. I prefer using my laptop for writing and/or watching movies. I can't hold it the way I could hold a kindle, so reading on it is more cumbersome than a kindle would be. I did shop around, the Sony reader thing does not appeal at all (I've heard some really bad feedback from friends who have it or have used it, plus it doesn't carry half the books or features kindle does). The Nook is not available in Canada yet (boo! Get on that, Barnes & Noble!) so I'm afraid a Kindle is the only one appealing to me. Too bad it costs more than I can afford at the moment. Sigh.

I realize this post is all over the place. I'm just too tired to care or try and gather thoughts in a concise manner. I've had a really craptastic week, if not longer, and I just can't be bothered. I don't even know why I am bothering to update, since I'm pretty sure I'm the only one who reads this thing anymore. Ah well, whatever.

The girls will be 1 year old on February 27th. That year went pretty damn fast.

Where are all the damn hovercars, meals in a pill, and teleporters?

Sad news about Betelgeuse:

http://www.rasc.ca/news/printer_The_Sky_This_Month_Jan_2010.shtml

Remember when we had a galaxy? Man, those were good times.

I've been a slacker. I know it. So much has happened in the past while. It's too much to absorb. It's not enough information. It is what it is.

I've had this song in my head. The video below is some dude doing a cover of the song. I'm finding I like his cover of the tune better than the original. He starts off a bit shaky but you learn to overlook it. Things happen that way sometimes. The original is a tune by The Editors, called No Sound But The Wind. It is slow and long and wintery. I don't know. Listening to it reminds me of winter and warm blankets and wine and love. Especially that last one. If I neglect this before, Happy Christmas to you, whoever still reads this. You are loved.

We can never go home
We no longer have one
I'll help you carry the load
I'll carry you in my arms
The kiss of the snow
The crescent moon above us
Our blood is cold
And we're alone
But I'm alone with you

Help me to carry the fire
We will keep it alight together
Help me to carry the fire
It will light our way forever

If I say shut your eyes
If I say look away
Bury your face in my shoulder
Think of a birthday
The things you put in your head
They will stay here forever
Our blood is cold
And we're alone, love
But I'm alone with you

Help me to carry the fire
We will keep it alight together
Help me to carry the fire
It will light our way forever

Help me to carry the fire
We will keep it alight together
Now help me to carry the fire
It will light up our way forever

If I say shut your eyes
If I say shut your eyes
Bury me in suprise
Where I say shut your eyes

Help me to carry the fire
We will keep it alight together
Help me carry the fire
It will light our way forever

Every time I hear an ABBA or ABBA-related tune, it makes me think of my father. I really really miss him.

Chiquitita, you and I know..
How the heartaches come and they go and the scars they’re leaving..
You’ll be dancing once again and the pain will end..
You will have no time for grieving..

I have tried this a couple of times before, but I am willing to try it again. Thirty days. 50,000 words. Wish me luck.

Buckle your seatbelts, this is going to be a long ride.

It's October 1st and I finally caved and put the furnace on. It's freezing outside.

My brother got married on the 19th of September. It was a lovely wedding and I was so happy for him and his new wife & their gorgeous daughters. Everyone had a fantastic time and it was everything I could have hoped for him and more. There were some funny bits - for instance, I was their MC and the cordless mic stopped working halfway through our introductions of the wedding party - I moved on like a trooper anyway and just spoke up louder until they could fix the problem.

Their daughters were all smiles all day and very well-behaved, regardless of the amount of people that ended up handling them all night. The food was excellent, the DJ was fantastic, everyone was in a good mood and I got to see some family I hadn't seen in years. My brother looked so handsome and my new sister-in-law was breathtaking. I cannot stress enough how wonderful their day was.

They gave out magnets as their gifts for guests - playing card ones for the men, and a pair ladybugs for the women. There is some Portuguese folklore about the ladybug and how it will always fly from you to your true love, which M didn't know when she chose them, and I find to be a good omen for their marriage.

I do have more to say, but I have been finding that with the cold weather comes a lack of the proper words to describe things. So I am going to cheat and show you the speech I had written as their MC.

Good evening everyone, and welcome. For those of you who don’t know me, I am R’s older sister. It is my great honor to be your MC tonight.

When R and M first approached me and asked me to be their MC, I did not hesitate to accept. It has only been the past few weeks that I’ve come to realize how difficult this task may be. Note, this is where I actually start to cry, so I can't remember if I managed to get the rest of this paragraph out. Anyone who knows me knows that underneath the sarcasm and humor lies a big sentimental schmuck, and so my greatest challenge today will be making it through this speech without crying. Especially since my dearest brother has begged me not to tell any embarrassing stories about him. I can’t make any promises, but I will try.

Once I'd composed myself, I went on:

M, I cannot thank you enough for meeting R and giving him exactly what he needed (the rest of this is between sobs) and had been searching for, a woman who would love him, forgive him his faults, and try to keep him in line. Believe me, keeping R in line is a very difficult task. I’d hate to inform you now, M but there is a strict no-return policy when it comes to R. Now that you legally and officially have him, he’s yours. (by this point, I had swung back to somewhat normal voice)

Growing up with R wasn’t easy, but it was never a dull moment either. We moved so much when we were kids, we were almost like gypsies – never staying in one place too long, until we made it to this city. Because we moved so much, the only constant we had was each other, which was both wonderful and terrible all at once. There were the dramas created by our Star Trek figurines; the bloodshed over various crazy moments on both our parts involving dog bites, bb guns, ginsu knives, and other perilous things; hiding under a blanket and imagining we had visited Neverland and fighting off imaginary crocodiles and pirates; staying up all night to “discover morning”. We squabbled the way most siblings do, but we were always there for each other when it mattered most, and always will be.

I cannot wait to watch my new twin nieces create their own adventures, and knowing how imaginative their father is, I am sure that there will always be trouble and fun between those two. R having two girls is God’s best kind of mischief played on him – they will have him wrapped around their fingers in no time, and causing him to lose a lot of sleep and likely a lot of hair over their hijinks. We can only pray that they inherit some of M’s responsibility or R will have no hope of surviving their teen years.

I’d like to welcome you M, to the great club of “having to spell your name to people for the rest of your life”. Having carried the name of (my birth last name here) for over 2 decades myself, I can guarantee you interesting times and much amusement when telemarketers try to pronounce it correctly.

About the bride – it’s hard to believe that I’ve known M for 9 years. It really does seem like only yesterday that this shy, quiet girl came into our home and was introduced as R’s new girlfriend. Being a suspicious sister, I initially kept my distance, wondering if she was here for the long run, or just a girl out to break my little brother’s heart.

M, I cannot tell you how pleased I am that you were here for the long run – and wow what a long run it’s been. I ad-libbed here: "You must be exhausted!" You deserve a medal for hanging in there so long where others would have run away. It’s really only been in more recent years that I’ve grown to know her better, and I am so very happy to have her for a sister. If I could ask for anyone on earth to be my brother’s bride, it would be you M, and I am overjoyed that today you said “I do”. I get a bit teary at this part. Shush. We all know what a big sap I am. I manage to compose myself again because I am a pro, dammit.

Anyone who knows M, knows that she loves lists. Apparently it is a family trait, inherited from her mother. It is one that has served her well. Anyone who knows R, knows that he isn’t a good planner, he hates lists, he is a last-minute decision maker, and rather relaxed when it comes to schedules. This is a match made in heaven – M will straighten out his schedule, while R will quietly sabotage M’s lists.

In the spirit of list-making, I’ve put together a list myself today – A list of things that happened on this day in history.

This day in History, September 19

1900 – Butch Cassidy & the Sundance Kid commit their first robbery.

1928 – Adam West was born.

1928 – Mickey Mouse’s first cartoon is shown.

1960 - Chubby Checker’s “The Twist” hits number one on the charts.

1970 – Mary Tyler Moore show premieres.

1974 – Eric Clapton received a gold record for “I shot the Sherriff”

1995 – Orville Redenbacker died.

1995 – International “Talk like a Pirate” day was born.

And here is where I lose it and start crying again. But the most important thing to happen on September 19 as far as I’m concerned is, R P & M W joined hands in marriage before friends, family, and God.

The rest of this is said with tears.

Before I call M's parents to come up and say their peace about the bride and groom, I humbly ask that you all raise your glasses in a toast.

May God be with you and bless you,

may you see your children's children,

may you be poor in misfortunes and rich in blessing,

may you know nothing but happiness from this day forward.

I love you both.

So on to the next adventure with them, and may happy memories lie in their wake.

The next weekend I took my daughter with me and we went with Hammer to see an All Girls Roller Derby. And hells yes, it is exactly as fun as it sounds. Daughter had a blast and I'm just waiting for the day she says she wants to be a Derby girl. I got her another button for her collection (She is collecting those little clever button pins with sayings or whatever on them) which pleased her very much. What I loved was that in the beginning all the derby girls were polite and as the night wore on they got more and more aggressive. The visiting team's coach ended up getting kicked out of the building. I'm half-tempted to take her to the next one coming up; we shall have to see.

Last night I was blessed with a surprise visit from my dear friend V, who lives in England and was here helping her mom move to a new apartment. She only had one night to stay and spend time with me and it was wonderful, and time went fast-forward as it always does with her, and the visit ended much too soon. But I am so thankful to have had it. I miss her already.

I've been knitting up a storm between everything, keeping my head on straight, and trying not to worry too much. Had a very long day with a neurologist last week, which ended in tears on my part again, but he was really actually very kind this time around. He said he was reluctant to diagnose me with anything neurological until I'd sorted out my digestive issues (which are many, and gross, and painful, and let's just say I don't have the time or patience to get into it right now). The reason for his reluctance is because there are actually quite a few digestive/organ-related issues that can affect a patient's nervous system as well, and he wanted that area explored before he further entertained the idea of neurological impediments.

I have an appointment to get a dye-injected CT of my abdomen, specifically my liver, because they found an anomoly in it when they did an ultrasound so now they want to check for carcinomas and hepatitis and other absolutely wonderful things. After this I am awaiting an appointment with a surgeon to do a scope, both ways, checking for ulcerative colitis, Chrohn's, and colo-rectal cancer. How fun!

So yeah, that's my life in a nutshell. Too tired to get into further details than that. Cheers.

A happy coincidence or intentional? Jarbas Agnelli takes note from birds on a wire and makes a lovely piece of music.

Birds on the Wires from Jarbas Agnelli on Vimeo.

I'm not a big fan of Sugababes, in fact I'd never heard of them before this morning, but someone linked me this video for a song called Ugly... and it was nice to see an uplifting type of song. I'm raising a daughter who is coming full blast into that point in her life where she's finding out the hard way that girls can be bitches, yes every last one of us, and it's important to drive home to her the "so what, I'm awesome, the rest of you suck, neener neener" attitude. Nothing hurts more than being teased for being yourself. So I guess this video is for her. (not able to embed, so click the link, and yes it's safe for work). The song isn't all that spectacular but I like its message.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bHaecEiBOGM